It’s not major surgery. Sure there are risks to any medical procedure but this one is pretty safe.
So why am I so anxious?
Why do I feel like I could throw up any minute?
Why am I scared?
Because the other half of my heart is somewhere behind that door. And I’m on this side wondering…
Is he nervous or anxious like me?
Is he pain?
Is everything going well?
I want so badly to be with him, hold his hand, rub his back.
But I can’t. So I sit in this waiting room, trying to distract myself with schoolwork, magazines, even writing this.
But until my little pager goes off, telling me I can have my baby back, I will be praying and trying to ignore the queasiness I’m feeling.
Because the man behind that door is my life and I will not be okay until I know he is.
